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ASS SETS

$ASS

The only assets that never leave

The token for people who actually hold. "We don't pump. We sit." Every transfer taxes 3% and rains pure Buttcoin on holders. You're not chasing pumps — you're collecting while you sit.

Contract Not launched yet

There is no contract address yet. Anyone posting one right now is lying to you.

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DIAMOND HANDS ✦ SOFT CHEEKS ✦ WE SIT ✦ YOU GET PAID IN BUTTCOIN ✦ RESIDUAL INCOME FOR RESIDUAL HUMANS ✦

How The Sitting Pays

Three steps. Two of them are just sitting.

🪑

You sit

Buy $ASS. Then do the hardest thing in crypto: nothing at all. No staking, no locking, no claiming, no dashboard to babysit.

💸

Everyone else moves

Every $ASS transfer carries a 3% tax, baked into the token itself at mint. Buys, sells, wallet-to-wallet sends — all of it feeds the pot.

🍑

It rains Buttcoin

When the pot is worth paying out, StonkFun splits it across holders pro-rata — in pure Buttcoin, straight to your wallet. You did not have to get up.

The honest bit

The 3% is a Token-2022 transfer fee written into the mint. It is permanent and it applies to every transfer, including sending $ASS to a friend. Payouts are triggered when the pot is large enough to be worth distributing, not on a schedule, and they are executed by StonkFun rather than by us. How much any holder receives depends entirely on trading volume and on how much $ASS they hold. It could be a lot. It could be dust. Nobody here is promising you a yield, a rate, or a return.

⚡ WE STAND ON THE SHOULDERS OF THE BUTT ⚡

✦ RESPECT WHERE IT'S DUE

Buttcoin walked so we could sit.

In May 2011 — two years before Dogecoin, when memecoins were not yet a category — someone on Something Awful asked the question that named the entire genre:

"Has anyone called them buttcoins yet?"

That line became Buttcoin.org, then r/Buttcoin, then fifteen years of the sharpest crypto satire on the internet, and finally a real Solana token. It is the original. Every memecoin since owes it a royalty.

So we pay ours. $ASS is paired against Buttcoin, which means every reward that reaches a holder is paid in Buttcoin. We are not borrowing the joke — we are buying it, forever, on every single transfer.

buttcoin.money ↗ @ButtCoin ↗ Buttcoin Foundation ↗

The lineage

₿

Bitcoin

2009

OG ✦

🍑

Buttcoin

2011

Ass Sets

2026

They named the genre. We just decided to sit in it.

Since 2011 ★ The meme that named all memecoins ★ Now our reward token

Ass Sets is an independent project. It is not affiliated with, endorsed by, or operated by Buttcoin, the Buttcoin Foundation, or StonkFun. Buttcoin is their meme and their token — we are simply a fan that pays rent.

Tokenomics

Short, because there isn't much to it

Supply

1,000,000,000

Network

Solana

Launchpad

StonkFun

Paired against

Buttcoin 🍑

Holder tax

3% — permanent

Rewards paid in

Buttcoin

Liquidity

Locked

Mint / freeze

Revoked

Solana Contract Address

Not launched yet — check back at launch

⚡ HOW TO START SITTING ⚡

Not live yet.

$ASS has not launched. There is no contract address, no pool, and nothing to buy — so there is nothing to ape into and no reason to trust a link that says otherwise.

When it goes live, this section fills in with the real address and the real venue. Until then, the only thing to do is the thing we're best at: sit.

What is StonkFun? ↗ Follow for the launch

Diamond hands ★ Soft cheeks ★ Paid in Buttcoin

Roadmap

We are extremely committed to this plan

Phase 1

Launch

Sit

Phase 2

Get listed somewhere

Sit harder

Phase 3

Hit seven figures

Still sitting

Phase 4

Official residual token of Solana

Eternal sit

Join the Ass Gang

Cheek Holders · Certified Sitters · no chairs provided